Mourning Joe

The politburo chose Comrade Morning Joe to begin the anti-Palin attack. Makes sense. Nearly everyone else is on the Fox payroll and Comrade General Secretary Comrade Murdoch will never allow dissension in his ranks. We know what happened when Comrade Political Secretary Comrade Rove lifted Christine O'Donnell's skirt just enough to show her cloven feet to his TV audience. Palin brings in too much hard currency to permit Fox-based criticism. Even a mild tongue cluck in defense of Hero of the Revolution Comrade Ronald Reagan would be inappropriate.

So, the politburo is left with Comrade Scarborough. Maybe they got Peggy Noonan to help hoist him out of the trench. I can see it now: Okay, Comrade, why don't you put down that cup of coffee? Won't be needing it where you are going. Bayonet fixed? Good. Now, big step up and start running toward those Tea-Party-Fox-News guns. Remember, the Politburo will likely cover your back from down here in the trench. We are all very proud of you, Comrade. This heroic action might even win you a Double-Cross.

Clown Car

I wish I could draw. Palin's pickup by Fox News suggests a political cartoon derived from the old circus visual cliche where a stream of clowns get out of a tiny car. The new version shows a television tuned to Fox with a line of clown-attired pundits spewing from the screen. Palin leads O'Reilly, Rove, Hannity, Beck, the Cheneys, Perino, Goldberg, and the rest. I see them all Munchkin-sized, in polka dots, orange bozo wigs, white gloves, huge shoes, and red globe noses. They strut into some poor bastard's living room, arms bent and elbows swinging in exaggerated happy self-importance.

Surprsing New Poll Result

Despite criticism from the left, a new Harrass Poll shows Sarah Palin getting a large boost in popularity from coverage of her Hong Kong speech.

Her popularity bounce also showed up in this week's Fantasy Presidential Voting League. The former Alaskan governor and beauty queen trounced Thomas Jefferson in head-to-head polling. Participants favored Palin's directness and plainspoken qualities. Jefferson had the advantage in experience, but that wasn't enough to overcome a long list of negatives. At the top was Jefferson's sexual relationship with his slave, Sally Hemings, who bore him six illegitimate children. His numerous writings questioning God and religion were also a strong negative issue for the voting group. Charges of elitism came up because of Jefferson's admitted enjoyment of expensive French wines and his long-winded oratorical style. That caused some of Palin's supporters to liken him to John Kerry. A few said they were uncomfortable with the third president because he used Bill Clinton's middle name as his own.

When told about the results, Palin said she had great respect for Mr. Jefferson, despite his age, but favored changing the US twenty-five cent piece to show Ronald Reagan's likeness instead of Jefferson's. She added, "It's OK to keep him [Jefferson] on the three-dollar bill."